True colors

When we go to a party even if it’s mostly adult, we always bring our daughter with us. Not because we don’t want to leave her home with someone but because some family friends (mostly of my mom) would like to see her. So if that is the case, we always let her have a long nap in the afternoon, about 3-4 hours so that she’ll have the energy to stay up late. And of course, like any parents, I would expect that she’ll be well mannered and no tantrums or caprices. For if any of these case happens, I will surely be angry.

We went to a party exactly a year ago with my daughter and at that time she wasn’t herself maybe because she didn’t have a full nap in the afternoon. So when we went to the birthday celebration, she was in fact very courteous. She greeted people she knew and say the usual greetings like “good evening.” Give them a “bisous” or kiss accompanying her greetings. And when somebody asks her how she is, she politely reply, “I’m fine, thank you” and return the gestures too. But as I’ve said she is not her usual self. She’s not talkative, she don’t run to and fro nor tell jokes or play with other adults there.

And there is one old lady who is sitting beside her and who, in my opinion is really trying to push her to her limit. She’s trying to joke with her, even though my daughter politely says that she doesn’t want to. But some, I said some, old lady are like that. My daughter is never impolite to anyone older or younger. So I just let my daughter handle the situation until she looked at me to find comfort and frowning. I asked her, of course, why. And she told me the story that “cette femme m’embête.” This means that “this woman is teasing me or (disturbing me).” And I asked if she asked the woman not to tease her. And she said yes.

While we are having these conversations, of course, the lady was listening. And I said these words to my daughter, “Honey, if you’re not up to it, like if you don’t want to talk or to be nice or if you don’t want to play or tell jokes then don’t. It’s not your obligation to please people. Ok.” And she said, “thank you, mama.” Maybe because she taught that I will get angry at her for not being polite enough to that particular lady.

Of course, what I’ve said put a scrutinizing eye on that lady. And as I expected, she asked me why did I advice my kid such a thing. And I politely told her that, “You know Ma’m all kids has moods and they should also be respected like we want to be respected when we’re not in the mood. And I don’t want to teach my daughter to please people even if she doesn’t want too. I’m just teaching my daughter to be herself and not to be pretentious.”

I’m sure that you have an idea to what happened next. She got up to find another person to talked to. Fine with me. At least, she left us in peace.

how she makes us proud

Whenever my daughter draws something or someone, in those little ways she makes us proud. She's a different person. Bits and pieces from us but never us. And we like her to develop her own identity. And not just be an extension of ourselves. That's why we encourage her as early as we can remember to explore what she likes and she did like drawings and paintings which both my husband and I can never do. Yes, I can draw but never like her. And here are some samples that I would like to share to you. Happy viewing.

writing again

I can not tell you that my child is perfect because she is not your child. Every son or daughter is perfect in the eyes of their parents. But all I can tell you is that my daughte is a perfect gift from God and that she is the reason why I live in an almost perfect world. If there is one thing in my life that I don't regret, it is having her unexpectedly. She may be unexpected but never unwanted.