Want to be and Can be

We all laugh at friends who can imitate the mannerism of people we know. And of course, we can also laugh at ourselves when we can imitate people whom we want to be. Models, singers, actors, actress, famous T.V. personalities.

But the question is why do we do such things? I understand it, if it is used for charades and the games alike. But when the reason goes with a deeper meaning... it is another story.

You see adolescent stage is the stage wherein we try not to be who we really are. Try different things to be "in" with the crowd, to be noticed by the girl/boy-next-door, so we can be the center of it all and so on and so forth. It is the time when we search for ourselves. I think it's a healthy process of self-discovery. That is why we try to imitate people whom we want to be. For when we have a glimpse at ourselves and see them in us we just feel like them- POPULAR, PETTY, COOL etc.... But at times we arrived to a point where we try to forget who we are just to be someone else. I'm not generalizing all adolescent and adults alike out there. But most of us, we passes through the stage where we seek who we are. But of course, just like every stage of our life, it passes. It will outgrow. But if we didn't get over that stage....we will grow old with no memories to look back on for what we had before is not the real "US.".

I said that I am not generalizing everybody here. One or two or even more didn't pass through this stage of wanting to discover who they really are. I say to them "good for you and goodluck in the future." But I bet you, whatever status we achieved right now, once in your lifetime, you wished you were richer, wealthier, better or healthier. For it is in our human nature to always seek and wish more than what we want to be.

I said "want to be" and not "can be." Let's first define the two. "Want to be like," is wishing something that you dream even if you can't become one. End result is becoming the people or person that is not us. You can loose yourself within this process. "Can be like," is an precise status of what we can become. End result is still you but much better.

"Can be like," in mixture with all the efforts that we forced ourselves to give will result in a positive way into our lives. "Want to be like," in mixture with all the efforts may result in either negative or positive. No guaranteed effect. Both can be attainable but the difference lies in what you become after the changes.

When we say that we want to be like Madona (or who ever is in your mind right now), you just end up just like the person whom you want to imitate. Very similar to that person. No difference at all. But when we say we can be like Madonna. It does not necessarily means that we end up just like her. There are, of couse, similarities but there are also differences.

Every person has this innate desire to be different. Who doesn't? For we were born unique even if in cases of identical twins. And there's nothing wrong with that. Provided that being different means keeping yourself intact. Focusing on what you can be like and not what you really want to be like.

It is like in a masquarade party. We want to be like somebody else....we put on make up, masks and clothes that looks faboulous on us. But at the end of it all, when we go to our little rooms, taking off all clothes, masks and make up, we all feel very light. For we are ourselves. No masks. Just you and your skin.

You see it is easier for a man to imitate another and convince the others that you're the same man and not the one you're imitating but what is harder is to imitate another and convince ourselves that we are whom we're imitating.